Hotel Receptionist? Hotel Superhero?

Now most of you who read this blog may have formed the opinion that I’m not the most competent person when it comes to doing my job as a hotel receptionist. Some of you may also have formed the opinion that I am not, shall we say, the sharpest tool in the shed.

I mean ok, maybe I do get aggravated when people call the hotel to do basic things like book accommodation or enquire about a table in the restaurant. And yes maybe I do always fall for the chef’s pathetic attempt for a cheap laugh by inadvertently ordering tubs of elbow grease, breasts of cod and one time, a bag of chicken lips.

But I’ll tell you one thing, you lot can laugh all you like… Because I know that when the chips are down, when it all goes Pete Tong, Cream Crackered, or whatever you want to call it. You can always count on yours truly to save the day.

The most recent example I can think of was Friday of last week.

It was around quarter to 6 in the morning when I was abruptly awoken by a text message on my phone from the lovely Sarah, my fellow full time receptionist to say

“Really sorry to text so early Em but I’m not gonna be able to make it in to work today. I’ve been really sick and fainted during the night so mum is gonna take me to the hospital. I’ve rang Rob to let him know. Really sorry again”

The text immediately startled me into a conscious state, first of all because I realised that Sarah was on the early shift that day meaning she was due in work in little over an hour and second of all because, well… I love Sarah and was genuinely worried about what was wrong with her. So I sat up in bed and quickly tapped in the number to ring rob, the night porter at the hotel to let him know that he didn’t need to worry and that I would be there at the usual time to cover the early shift instead. It didn’t really matter at that point that I was meant to be doing the late shift that day, all that mattered was covering the early, I would sort out the afternoon shift later on that morning. The priority was to ring Rob before he did anything stupid like ringing another member of staff or god forbid… the Boss! And so…


“Hiya Rob it’s Emma”
“Oh hiya Em”
“Are you alright?”
“Yeah are you?”
“Yeah I’m fine I’ve just had a text from Sarah letting me know she’s not coming in so…”
“Oh yeah she rang me this morning at half 5 so I’m just trying to sort it out now”
“What do you mean you’re sorting it out?”
“Well I was just looking for Rea’s number on the computer”
“Rob, Rea doesn’t work there any more. Rea left 8 months ago”
“Yeah I know but…”
“Right. Rob. Don’t – Ring – Anyone”
“Ok I just thought….”
“Yep, Rob I know, and thank you but it’s fine. I’m awake, I’m up and I’ll be there at 7 clock to cover the early”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes”
“I thought you were on the late today?”
“Yeah I am but I’ll sort that out later”
“Are you sure because…”
“Yep, Rob, I’m sure. Thanks”
“Ok Em, erm… I’ll see you in a bit”

Now then I was just about to put the phone down so I could get myself ready for work, but something stopped me, there was little bit of awkwardness in Robs tone a kind of, hesitance to his voice that suggested he had something to say to me but wasn’t quite sure how to say it, and so, I thought about it for a sec and just took a stab in the dark guess and asked

“Who have you rang Rob?”
“I rang Sophia”
“And what time did you ring Sophia?”
“At about half 5”
“And what did she say?”
“She didn’t answer”
“Ok, don’t ring her again Rob”
“No I won’t”
“Ok. I’ll see you later on”

And so I put the phone down and just sat there on the edge of the bed, a little dazed trying to pull myself together. Within 2 minutes the phone rang again

“Hiya Rob”
“Hiya Em”
“Are you ok?”
“Yeah, Sophia’s just rang back”
“And what did she say?”
“She said no she can’t come in”
“Ok Rob, thanks for letting me know”
“No problem. I’ll see you later”

So that morning I went into work to do the early shift. Luckily I’d had an early night and had washed and straightened my hair so I was feeling rather fresh and sprightly, but there was one thing that was kind of playing on my mind.

The thing is that our boss has this thing about absence and lateness. If it were up to him people would plan their illness’s at the beginning of the year to coincide with their holidays so that he didn’t have the inconvenience of having to cover their shifts or God forbid having to sign anything regarding statutory sick pay. In this instance however he didn’t have either of those things to think about given that I had already sorted the whole thing out without having to get him involved. I had got in at 7:00am and had planned to work until 5:30pm until Helen, another receptionist who I had text earlier that morning, could come in to cover the latter part of the late shift. Job Done. But knowing the boss as well as I do and knowing that he can’t help getting involved in things that are nothing to do with him I just knew that when he came in and saw me at the desk instead of Sarah he wouldn’t be able to help but start ranting that “People should just soldier on” and “these youngsters today just don’t know how to show commitment” and “Rotas are there to give structure and people shouldn’t go changing them at the last minute to suit them” I was about to be very much surprised.

At around 8:30 the boss walked into the back office and put his briefcase down on his desk. I sat up and prepared myself to be bombarded with questions, but instead… he said nothing. He just looked through his in-tray, didn’t say a word and went straight into the restaurant for breakfast.

I think dumfounded is the best word to describe my reaction to what happened. I just sort of sat there squinting and running through it all in my head. Maybe I had got it wrong. Maybe I had dreamt the whole thing about the text from Sarah and the conversation with Rob and it should have been me on the early shift the whole time. That couldn’t possibly be it could it?

20 minutes later he came out of the restaurant and into the back office, I just sat in awe watching him and thinking

“He’ll click in a minute”

But no. Another 10 minutes passed and then that was it . I couldn’t help myself, I got up, glanced in the mirror and walked over to the door…

“Hiya” I said
“Hiya” He replied

This was followed an awkward pause (only awkward on my part) as I stood in the doorway whilst he sat at his desk with his back to me, engrossed in the emails that had come through that morning. Very strange I thought. And so I went on…

“Are you alright” I asked
“Yeah” he replied
“Good” I said That’s good”

This was followed by another awkward pause. At that point I think he must have felt my confused stare upon him cos he sort of turned around and glanced at me then turned back, then turned around again and asked

“Are you alright?”
“Yeah” I replied
“Good” He said “That’s good”

It then became clear to me that he had absolutely no idea that Sarah should have been the desk that morning instead of me. Either that or he didn’t care. But what confused me was that neither of those possibilities would normally be viable. First of all because the boss very rarely forgets anything and prides himself on knowing everything that is going on at the hotel at all hours of the day and night(normally because he always f**king ringing and asking), and second of all because he is renowned for getting involved in things that
A) Don’t concern him
&
B) Are not his place to sort out.


It was all very confusing and to be honest I wasn’t quite sure what to make of it. I toyed with the idea of not saying anything but then concluded that he’d find out eventually and then freak out because he hadn’t been told the ins and outs of it all, and so, I walked up behind him and said…

“Do you want to know what I’m doing here?”

He turned round and just gave me a blank, vacant stare

“What do you mean?”
“Well… I was meant to be on the late shift today”
“Were you?”
“Yes I was”
“Oh? Right”
“But then Sarah text me at 5:30 this morning to say that she couldn’t come in to do the early shift because she wasn’t very well”
“Ok”
“So I’m staying till half 5 today”
“Right”
“Then Helens coming in and taking over from me to do the latter part of the late shift”
“Ok”
“And Sarah will be back in on Sunday”
“Great”
“So everything’s been sorted”
“Good”
“And there’s no need for you to worry”
“Fine”

He then turned back to look at his emails leaving me in yet another state of confusion as to why he wasn’t asking “Megs Arse” about the situation and course of events of the morning like, “What time exactly did Sarah text you” and “Why didn’t she let us know 24 hours before the unforeseen incident happened so that we could arrange appropriate cover?” Stuff like that. And so frustrated, I carried on

“Do you wanna know what’s wrong with Sarah?” I asked in a sharp tone that seemed to get his attention very quickly
“Yep” he replied as he spun round in his chair looking rather startled “yeah, I do, is she alright?”
“No not really”
“No?”
“No”
“What’s wrong with her?”
“She woke up in the night feeling dizzy and nauseous and then she fainted”
“Oh dear”
“And so her mum’s had to take her to the hospital”
“Right”
“So, no she’s not brilliant at the moment but hopefully she’ll be alright for Sunday”
“Ok good, good that’s good”
“Yeah”
“Ok well it seems like you’ve got it all under control so MIKE!!!!!!!!”

And I’d lost him, he barged past me to go in pursuit of the maintenance man no “Thanks for getting up at 5:30am to come in and cover” nothing.

I still don’t know what happened that morning. Maybe his body had been taken over by another life form, maybe he fell and hit his head and just didn’t mention it to anyone. Who knows? But the point of the story is exactly what I said before, Forget the grumpiness, forget the incompetence, forget that incident that happened on Christmas Eve that I still refuse to take full responsibility for, when the going gets tough, You can always count on yours truly to swoop in and save the day

It’s just a good thing I do this job for the laughs rather than the recognition. Other wise we’d all be in big trouble!

Wouldn’t we?